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Jokes short and funny

Started by sushmi, Aug 21, 2020, 11:38 AM

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sushmi

Need cheering up? Start a fight with somebody when they have the hiccoughs!

A woman comes home late in the night and goes quietly in the bedroom. To her surprise, she sees male and female feet peeking out from under the blanket. Shocked and raging, she gets her baseball bat and beats and beats until all movement stops. After that she goes into the living room and sees her husband laying on the sofa. He turns to her half asleep: "Oh, you're home, darling. I'm afraid we have to sleep here tonight, my parents came for a surprise visit."

Me and my wife, we've decided that we don't want to have children. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? - Snowballs.

Police: "Open the door!" - Man: "I don't want any balls!" - Police: "What? We don't have balls!" - Man: "I know."

A chubbier woman: Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all? - Mirror: "Kindly move aside. I can't see anything."