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Started by sushmi, Aug 21, 2020, 11:03 AM

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I'm really lazy in the mornings. I mean, going out of the shower to go to the toilet and then back in? That's just too much time and effort. And with a bit of patience, the water will carry the little pile away without any remains.

Son comes in from outside, stops just behind the house door and yells, "Moooooooom!!!!" - His mother screams in frustration from the first floor, "I've had enough of this constant hollering. If you've got something to say, come and say it to me in person, don't just yell like that!" - The boy obediently walks through the hall, up the stairs and into his mom's room and says, "Look mom, I stepped in dog's doo doo!"

Two prison guards are changing shifts in the morning, "You know that prisoner 885 ran off in the night?" The other guard sighs, "Ah finally. No more of that dang hammering."

A guest is ordering at a restaurant, "Do you think you could bring me what that gentleman over there is having?" - The waiter looks at him sternly, "No sir, I'm very sure he intends to eat it himself."