Jokes short and funny

Started by sushmi, Aug 21, 2020, 11:06 AM

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sushmi

Man to his priest: "Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl." The priest: "Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once." Man: "And that frees me from my sin?" Priest: "No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin."

Doctor: "I've found a great new drug that can help you with your sleeping problem."   Patient: "Great, how often do I have to take it?"   Doctor: "Every two hours."

I heard a report about a bad outbreak of the tummy bug, apparently 9 out of 10 people there suffered from diarrhea. I can't stop thinking about that tenth person who apparently enjoyed it.

On a mountain trip a man falls down into a crack. His wife calls after him, "Are you OK?" - "Yeah!" - "Are you hurt?" - "No!" - "Not a scratch? How come?!" - "I'm not done falling yet-et-et-et-et!"

Policeman: I'm very sorry, sir, but it looks like your wife got hit by a bus. - Man: I'm aware of that, but Karen has a wonderful personality.

Source: https://short-funny.com/funniest-jokes-2.php