Funny Yet Interesting

[madhu]

How do you make a rock float?

You put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer!

[madhu]

Why was the woman fired from the assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake!

[madhu]

I tried to catch fog yesterday.

But, I mist...

[madhu]

What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a Bun...

[madhu]

How do Chickens get strong?

They egg-cersize...

[madhu]

Why did Christmas Tree go to the barber?

It heard it was time to trim the tree...

[madhu]

What do you call an exploding monkey?

A bab-boom!

[madhu]

Who walks into a restaurant, eats shoots and leaves?

A Panda...

[madhu]

Do you need special training to be a litter collector?

No you just pick it up as you go

[madhu]

What did the bed say to the blanket?

don't worry i have got you covered..

[madhu]

What's the best way to decide on buying a new mattress?

Go home and sleep on it .....

[madhu]

What's a clock's sidekick called?

His "second-hand" man...

[madhu]

What did the igneous rock say to the sedimentary rock?

Your Metamorphic!

[madhu]

Did you here about the guy who lost all left of his side?

He's all right now!

[madhu]

What goes up when the rain comes down?

An umbrella!

[madhu]

Why did the Picture go to Jail?

He was Framed!!!

[madhu]

What does a black belt eat for lunch?

Kung-Food!!

[Kalyan]

I want to join your old organisation in INDIA


A young, well qualified Officer left the job, emigrated to Canada for better prospects and applied for a salesman's job at Vancouver's premier downtown department store. It was the biggest store in the world:

you could get anything there.

The boss asked him, "Have you ever been a salesman before?"

"Yes sir, I was a salesman in India.

The boss liked him and said, "You can start tomorrow. Learn fast and do well."

The first working day was long and arduous for the young man, but he got through it.

Finally 6 pm came around. The boss duly fronted up and asked, "How many sales did you make today?"

"Sir, I made ONE sale!" said the young salesman rather happily.

"Only one sale?!" shot back the boss. "No! No! You see, most of my staff make 20 or 30 sales a day.

If you want to keep this job, you'd better be doing better than just one sale.

By the way, how much was your sale worth?"

"933005 pounds," said the man.

"What?! How did you manage that?" asked the flabbergasted boss.

"Well," said the salesman, "this man came in and I sold him a small fish hook, then a medium hook and finally a really large hook.
Then I sold him a good fishing rod and some fishing gear.

Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast.

So I told him he'd be needing a boat, so I took him down to the boat department and sold him that 20-foot schooner with the twin engines.

Then he said his Volkswagen wouldn't be able to carry it, so I took him to our automotive department and sold him that new Deluxe 4X4 Blazer.

I then asked him where he'll be staying and since he had not decided, I took him to camping department and sold him a six-sleeper camper tent.

Then he said I should throw in about $200 worth of groceries and two cases of beer."

The boss took two steps back and asked in astonishment, "You sold all that to a guy who came in for a fish hook?!"

"No, sir," answered the young man, "he came in to buy a headache relief tablet and I convinced him that fishing is the best remedy for headache."

Boss: "Where did you work?!"

"AGENT in the
LIFE INSURANCE CORPORATION OF INDIA, sir."

Boss: "Please take my chair. I want to join your old organisation."

[madhu]

Why did the Cow cross the road?

Because he wanted to go to the mooooovies!

[madhu]

What do you call an owl that knows magic?

HOODINI!

[madhu]

What kind of hair does the ocean have?

Wavy...

[madhu]

Why is Santa good at Karate?

Because he has a black belt.

[madhu]

What did the math teacher name her cow?

Cow-culator! (Calculator!)

[madhu]

What is Nemo's least favorite candy?

Swedish Fish!

[madhu]

The shoemaker did not deny his apprentice anything he needed.

He gave his awl!

[madhu]

What is the most dangerous type of jewelry?

The ring of fire!

[madhu]

What did the robot say when it couldn't catch the train?

Cannot commute!

[madhu]

what is a cats favorite color?

Purr-ple!

[madhu]

Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the Piano..

[madhu]

What did the bride say when she dropped her bouquet?

Whoopsy daisies!

[madhu]

Why was the graveyard so noisy?

Because all of the coffin! (Coughing!)

[madhu]

Why did Mickey Mouse go to space?

He went to visit Pluto!!

[madhu]

What letter is always wet?

C (Sea) !!!

[madhu]

What do you use to FIX teeth?

Toothpaste..

[madhu]

Why do pirates take so long to finish the alphabet?

They spend years at C! (Sea!)

[madhu]

What should you say to solid, liquid, or gas when they are sad?

What's the matter?

[madhu]

Why was the cookie sad?

because his mom was a wafer so long!

[Kalyan]

Wife : I think....

Husband: . . . Exactly !

Wife: But I haven't said anything yet!

Husband : Doesn't matter. You're right....! 😃🙏🏻

Sept. 21- Happy International Peace day

[madhu]

Did you hear about the pencil joke?

Never Mind. It's Pointless...

[madhu]

When is an Irish potato not Irish anymore?

When it's a French fry!

[Kalyan]

One interesting word in English

OXYMORON :

An Oxymoron is defined as a phrase in which two words of opposite meanings are brought together...

Here are some funny oxymorons :

* Clearly Misunderstood
* Exact Estimate
* Small Crowd
* Act Naturally
* Found Missing
* Fully Empty
* Pretty Ugly
* Seriously Funny
* Only Choice
* Original Copies

And people say the Mother of all Oxymorons is-

"Happily Married"